Long Overdue Update

William is using his words consistently now, albeit still with great difficulty. We finally got him in front of a psychiatrist specializing in children with autism. Given Will's particular set of behaviors we agreed that a sedative (in this case Tenex) would likely be of the most benefit to him. After 2 weeks on it he had improved in some areas, but had become unacceptably emotional and withdrawn.

The next appointment had him on Adderall. We were warned with this transition that he might become more emotional, however, as he adjusted to the medication he became VIOLENTLY emotional. It became more and more difficult to get him to do the simple things that he hadn't really had any problem with before.. like getting ready for school. He also lost weight over the 2 week period, and this is a child that, due to his picky eating, didn't have much weight he could afford to lose in the first place.

He finally got to the point on Friday where we just could not get him to cooperate and he went without the medication. Friday was a "difficult" day for him at school, according to the report in his communication log. Saturday was worse and he refused to eat anything in the morning so he didn't get his dose that day either. His violent outbursts were downright scary. However.. as the day wore on he ate and calmed down. He spoke his requests wonderfully. He played, calmly, with his brother and sister. He did not hyper-focus on playing his complex computer games. He was likely the most "normal" I've ever known him to be.

The human brain is still a mystery. The experts have determined that the part of the brain that is responsible for controlling fever is also associated with autism behaviors. This was virtually unknown when I began writing this journal three years ago, despite countless care givers (including myself) having noted a correlation between fever and autism behaviors. As a sidebar, I'm really disappointed that there isn't more out there on this connection. The best I could find was this recent article, but it's just a rehash of what was being "announced" almost two years ago in April of 2009. I hope they're working on it.. because these two medications don't look like they're going to help my little boy one bit.

However, the processes his brain had to go through in adjusting to not only one but two rather powerful medications seems to have had a long term effect. He IS more stable. He IS more talkative. He is focusing well on his tasks. But not because of him being ON the medications. He seems to have experienced some perspectives in that wild roller coaster ride that have helped him now that he's OFF the medications. (Please.. it would be totally inappropriate for you to consider taking your child off of medications that are helping him/her without talking to your child's doctor first.)

Only time will tell if these changes prove to be lasting.. but for now.. he's a happy and content little boy who's eating everything in sight. =)

Use Your Words

With the arrival of warmer spring weather we're faced with the same issues we have every summer. Whereas the cold weather makes William want to do nothing but stay indoors where it's warm, the warm weather makes him want to do nothing but stay outdoors where it's lovely. I can't blame him, I rather enjoy it too. But life being what it is it's just not possible for me to spend from 4:00 to 9:00 outside watching him. I have things I need to tend to in the house. And this evening when the time came for him to come inside and have dinner he protested like he usually does.. with screaming. I got him fed and plenty to drink. I got him changed for bed and although the screaming had diminished a bit he was still obviously upset. No amount of asking what he wanted would result in a response other than screaming. Dad mentioned that he had run into a similar situation recently and had asked him to "use his words" to tell him what he wanted. William answered that he wanted the bike inside. It had been left out on the porch and he wanted it back in the house. Such an easy thing to solve.. and yet such a hard thing for him to convey. So with that suggestion I went to William tonight and asked him to use his words to tell me what he wanted. He thought for a moment and very quietly answered. He said it so quietly, so tentatively, that I couldn't quite make it out. It wasn't "bike inside".. it was short.. only one syllable. I asked him to tell me again and strained to listen. I shushed his little brother so I might have a chance at catching it.. I begged him to say it AGAIN. He did. The words he said were shocking. He said.. "I want love please." I cried as I held him as he drifted off to sleep.

So many questions...

Next week my son is being moved from the preschool classroom where he has been since he started school. The preschool is being inundated with new enrollees (gee.. you think this stuff is on the rise??) and so the class sizes are continually growing. Next year the whole preschool will be moved to the other school but for the rest of this year they're moving just some of the kids into this "new" classroom. I would imagine some of the kids who will now be his classmates will be new.. and he'll have a new teacher, too. It's a shame on a lot of fronts as he's gotten to know the people he's been with, his teachers and classmates, quite well over the last 3 months. He's learned better sharing and better communication. He's even learned to use the potty! And all of that is going to be disrupted. Yet, on many levels, I think it's a good thing. He's actually moving to the school and classrooms that he'll be in once he gets to Kindergarten and through the rest of his elementary schooling. He'll have the opportunity to see that, even though some things change, some things stay the same. His new teacher may be even better than his first.. although that's hard to imagine. And in the past, every time he has been challenged by new and unfamiliar events and subjects he has evolved in ways that went beyond the expected growth for that experience. But, for now, he's been screaming a lot more than he usually does. I can't help but wonder if it's because he knows something "big" is about to happen and his life will be turned upside down.. if just for a little while. It won't take him long to settle in to the new routine. But I'm afraid for him for the journey.